dont give up dood.............
as a few stabs in the dark with the engine............... warm it up and unscrew the oil filler cap, see if you have back pressure or vapor, if its back pressure it should try and blow the filler cap off, not like a fountain but you know the score
2nd thing, that dodgeeie spark plug. i had 1 that was leaking compression past the ceramic causing a light misfire, but the unburnt fuel was getting into the sump, slightly thinning the oil and causing vapor to come out of the dipstick.............
only other thing on the oil usage front, check the turbo oil feed and return pipes are good, and the water cooling to the turbo, could be abit of oil being super heated.........
i can stab in the dark no longer hahahaha, hope you get it sorted........... if not i may have a cs for you FOC(ked) hahahahaha

steve